HTML tags and other such paraphernalia

I'm lost. Lost in a maze of tags and curly brackets and begin-end statements. The back slashes have lashed out at me, and the semi-cologne stinks. There is HTML and XML and MML and XXL, I just dont know which is what. I never thought I would need any of it. My interest in the web has always been restricted to gleaning information (and pornography). And all of a sudden, I have entered this new world of bloggers who are web hacks. There are HTML sorcerors like buckwaasur, code wizards like void, photography paparazzi like funnycide, and the mother of them all : karma!

And amongst them is poor little Goober. A lost little child who knows as much about maintaining a website as Bush does about geography. And he's lost. He cant add tags, he cant have doodle boards, he doesnt even know how to put pictures. He's afraid he is going to disappoint everybody with his ignorance.... help him dear brothers and sisters :) help him!